The Meaning of Life (A Poem)

The Meaning of Life

For every breathe of life, there is a sigh of death.

For every act of kindness, there is an act of hatred.

For every moment of joy, there is one of sorrow.

For every beginning, there is an end.

The meaning of life encompasses these elements of reality. There’s a special sort of ebb-and-flow to the process. Something so ordinary at first glance; rapidly transitions to something so incredibly phantasmal and fantastical.

As our lives are ever weighed by the shifting times both ahead of us and behind us; our present-moment is ever morphing to adapt to the unseen trials and tribulations surrounding us.

Change is in the air, ever omnipotent and ever-present. Can you not feel it?

In your very bones, in your very soul and being. There’s something strange coming this way. And yet…there is also a hidden blessing in all of the chaos to ensue. A calling only you can answer.

It’s the call of the human experience.

When the world is faced with the coming dark hour, the cycle is preparing to start anew once more. As history repeats itself, so do we as a people.

For all of our glory and horrors, for all of our accomplishments and shame, and for all of our shared truths and deceptions – there is one constant reality to the universe around us.

Nothing ever stays the same.

Change is brewing.

A sense of immediate danger emits.

A silent hope bubbles above the surface.

Will you survive? Will I survive? What will become of our future?

Such are the questions of two love-birds who glide together for one last time before the currents of wind change their course forevermore. Even at this strange time in our world’s history – it is evident enough that history truly does repeat itself. Life for us has always been plagued with war and peacetime. Ever like a pendulum gliding back-and-forth ever so slowly.

Time is shifting.

You will be faced with many obstacles that will test everything you thought you stood for. You will begin to understand and see the world through new eyes. You’ll morph into a new person altogether, not familiar with the person you see from your reflection. Just like a pendulum too, you’ll eventually swing back to your old self. But for now, life is calling upon a darker self. A much more adaptable self.

Though the end is always inevitable, how will you change the world? For your future is just beyond the horizon…

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

(Click anywhere on this sentence to view the photo credit!)

Transformation

(Inspiration for this poetic piece, click me to listen to song)

Transformation

I feel myself disconnecting from who I am.

Who I am….

Who I…………..was?

I’m beginning to wonder: what’s wrong with me? 

Why am I losing pieces of myself?

Why are those pieces floating out of my consciousness like a stream of water flowing downstream at an unimaginably blinding speed?

I see you. 

I…..saw you?

I’m beginning to wonder if I’m starting to see you or if I’m beginning to see…….my own reflection?

Like a kaleidoscope of dizzying colors, my once dreary eyes are beginning to see the faint lights of ever-changing fates.

To see the potential of you and I. To feel the winds of unspoken truths caress my face with faulty lies.

I’ve begun to speak in my dreams of feverish nightmares borne of an indifference to what’s going on in our shared world.

I’ve begun to distance myself from who we are meant to be.

I’ve broken our promise.

I’m sorry.

I’m so incredibly sorry.

I feel like I failed who I was meant to be.

And yet…

Yet my future is bright.

What does that even mean?

Why do we cherish those who have “made it”?

One day.

One day, I swear on my very soul.

I will live my truth.

I will change this world, even if for just a flash of a moment.

I will change the collective consciousness of our society for just a second in history.

I will defend the honor of what it means to truly survive and thrive in this world, I will remind myself of why I still breathe.

No doubt the best of humanity dies young; for the old and aging continue to live and support this world full of deception and abuse. I should know, I’m becoming such a thing. Such a creature of the night.

Why haven’t I ended it all for myself?

I don’t feel suicidal. That’s likely the reason why. But still…why am I playing along with this game?

I can’t stop myself either. I’m filled with determination unlike anything of this world. But…why? Why am I so competitive? Why am I so determined? Even though I don’t wish to be, I just am?

Confusing thoughts spiral in my mind as a wave of over-confidence washes over me…or is it doubt?

But I’m not indecisive; though I wish I was at this moment.

I wish I was more confused than I’m playing it out to be.

I wish I could come up with some excuse; some tainted truth.

Thoughts intertwined with hallowed emotions. I don’t actually feel anything at this moment. I’ve become numb. And yet, my heart still beats? It beats with life, with the ever-pulsing rhythm of life.

Why has our world succumb to such devastation and derelict woes?

Why, why, why, why, why, why.

Our voices are drowned out, our opinions are non-existent, and our stories will forever be untold.

The truth will forever glimmer in the moonlit sky like a long-forgotten wish. The truth will flicker as a lone candle does in the dead of night. The truth will be unseen like the silent bird which has no voice to sing. The truth will exist, but only for itself alone. It will never be comforted, never be hugged with delight or cherished for its unique characteristics. It will never be able to shine so brightly that the sun, and the moon, and all the stars are meaningless to the bountiful life on Earth.

The truth will forever remain unclaimed. Forever untouched and despised. For truth brings inconvenience. It fosters a sense of hostility between two souls. It reminds all of us of our inevitable death. It reminds us that life is so precious; yet we are wasting it away day-in-and-day-out by working away at a job which holds no meaning to our true community; our true loved-ones.

The truth is harsh.

It is cruel and cold.

Like the nights of cold-sweat drenching your body; it is unforgiving and relentless. Like the days full of addiction and of growing numbness to life; rejection of truth brings about the calamity of your very existence. Like the darkening sky full of dread, or the mysterious secrets veraciously biting away at your soul as you try and reason and bargain with darker realities. Truth untouched is like a baby without her mother. It is like an unheard cry in the middle of nowhere. It is like the blood-thirsty eyes of a feral creature ready to devour it’s prey.

It is like the breaking of glass, as the world comes shattering down upon the weight of our lies.

But…

Once acknowledge and accepted; truth transforms it’s once ugly disguise into a beautiful soul.

Dancing in the light of day, truth can once again show us the way to salvation and holiness.

It can help us become worthy of being named children of goodness. Children of the righteous path – even if it isn’t always the easiest one.

Truth……

Truth can set us free again.

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

 

Source of photo: (click me to view picture credits)

An Open Letter to the Universe

Hello world, it’s R.S. Noel just checking-in to see how things are going in the world currently.

I wonder…why are there so many possibilities? Why is there ab endless array of choices to choose from? There’s a bottomless list of items, destinations, and places I’ve yet to venture to – because, I’ve been so enraptured by the things I still feel are necessary to do before I ever get to that point in life. I’ve started so many things recently in my life, and oddly enough; I don’t feel overwhelmed this time around. I actually feel productive and ready to take on the world with all of its painful and glorious moments.

Feeling productive is certainly not the same as being enslaved by our limitless efforts to  find some semblance of peace in our lives; or is it? There are people who are less fortunate then me, and then, there are many other people who are more fortunate then us. I wonder, what is our lot in this life? To toil away for the rest of our days, to break our bodies down over time due to the natural progression of life? Certainly there is something more out there, or is there…?

Maybe it really is all about perspective. Maybe it truly does come down to “in the eye of the beholder.” Whatever each of us, on an individual level, seeks out in life will depend greatly on our secret wishes, dreams, and desires.

But then, there are those moments. Ah yes, those moments of complete and utter bewilderment, confusion, and delusion. I begin to feel myself slowly drifting off into nothingness, barely holding onto the single metaphorical piece of wood which accompanies me down this stream which leads to the vast unknown.

Oddly enough; in this moment of immense uncertainty, I feel more connected with the world and the universe then I have ever felt before. In this moment of absolute distortion and chaos, I see the world. I see what is and what was. I see the beauty of friendship and camaraderie grow like a wild rose in the plains of heaven. I see the injustice and cruelty of cold, callous hearts, and all of the injustices thrown onto the people of this physical world. I see the lines of society blur between the lines of humanity, for better and for worse. I see marriage between two souls forever intertwined in a moment of inescapable blessings and curses. I see the mingling of darkness veiled within the expanse of light. I see the truth, no matter the mood.

So I say on this finite note, the many esoteric words no other human dares speak.

Why are you willingly allowing the world to change who you are? Who are you even? You should be changing the world, not the other way around. There are no excuses, there are no good reasons. You must steady your hand and stand tall for what you believe in. Take your convictions and grow a garden of life, not of evil. Don’t be afraid of the darkness either, for both light and dark create the equilibrium of life. Always remember however, to tread carefully.

Lest you get lost in the void of no-return. Then, and only then, will you forever lose yourself within the abysmal and unfamiliar darkness of surreal realities…

 

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

 

Source of Photo (Click Me for Photo Credits)

Gaining New Perspectives in Life

When you write, a lot of the times there are many different angles to look at any given situation you’re focused on. Whether you’re writing a non-fiction or fiction book, you’ll usually find yourself wondering which way is the best manner in which to start or view your topic of choice. It’s always important to see something from multiple viewpoints, you never want to look at a piece of writing and wonder what the purpose behind it is.

Yet this post isn’t about writing. No, it’s about the new perspectives gained through being more aware of your environment (both imagined and real).

Some of the best methods of gaining a new perspective in your life is to imagine what your own experience would be like in a different person’s position. Better yet, you can also imagine what the world must feel like on a daily basis. Just imagine what the life of a mouse must be like. Or even how the sound of a clock ticks while an empty house remains silent amidst a time of vast uncertainty. The possibilities are endless with this type of thinking.

There’s no end to creativity, the only limit is yourself. Never be too afraid, always question the validity of a person, a situation, or even the state of our world. The more you start to question, the more you begin to realize that everything in life is permitted. With this viewpoint, you can better understand a lot of the current world affairs in today’s globalized society.

A defining moment in any person’s life, is characterized by a sense of awakening, or even a sense of understanding herself/himself in the world and where they stand in it. It can be a truly humbling, and sometimes even terrifying, realization when you begin to understand and come to terms with a lot of the realities of our existence and what it even means to be human in this ever-changing environment. To grasp your own identity is the single best thing you can ever do, not only for yourself, but for those around you who truly love you and cherish you for who you are as a human being in the world.

On a more transparent note, I want to let you know, that perspective also helps you to heighten your sense of awareness of the crueler fates amidst our globalized world. Because in some manner, you will realize that even if you’re just one person in a sea of others, you can change the world (even if it is at a micro-level, it’s still very significant in the grander scheme of life). Your actions, especially during times of hardship and uncertainty in your society, can help to further strengthen the bonds and connections you have with those around you.

Perspective of different people, different life-forms, and different ideologies, is probably the best tool to have if you are a writer. You’re able to understand so many otherwise mysterious concepts in mainstream society. You’re able to better analyze why something happened, and the many different things that caused it.

It’s kind of like being a detective, but the only thing is, no one in the entire world knows you’re paying attention.

If you choose to be naïve or willingly ignorant, I cannot judge you. I used to judge people on being ignorant, back when I was a teenager. But now that I’m an adult, I’ve come to understand that everything (and I mean everything) has a reason for being the way it is; and those things don’t necessarily change as quickly as they should. Some things can stay the “same” for a very, very long time. Inevitably, however, things do change. Whether it be in minutes, hours, days, months, years, centuries, or a millennia – everything eventually succumbs to change.

I could go on, but my time is limited today. I have a lot of work to do, and so little time to finish it. If anything, I’ll leave you with one simple thought: hold the deepest parts of yourself close to your soul, but also let the world see a part of who you truly are. In this way, you can better build your own personality through the different tribulations and trials out there in our shared environment.

After all, we show only the parts of ourselves which we want the world to see. Ultimately, this is what makes perspective so fascinating and intriguing. Different perspectives are the only hidden truth worth discovering in this estranged and chaotic world.

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

In Times of Darkness

Some days are more difficult than others; but I’ve recently discovered that no matter where you are in your life, you can always make the best of any situation no matter the adversity. After all, there’s no true end-goal in our lives; there are only opportunities to succeed or fail.

Hi everyone, it’s me R.S. Noel coming to you with another post, and today I’ll be discussing the amazing power within you and me.

In times of darkness, we can become more than just ordinary people. We are all incredibly talented in one way or another; and as human beings, we have the chance and opportunity to truly take what is ours. In this society driven by pure competition and favoritism; we as people can still find ways to make a difference in the world. We need 3 things: hard-work, opportunity, and luck. Even if people try to sabotage you in some way, or even if you feel under-appreciated in your work, or even if you think you’ll never succeed; the truth of the matter is that you have to try first in order to know what you can do to better your chances of success at whatever it is you’re actively working at.

I’ve realized at 24 years of age, that nothing is impossible. Truly nothing. You can quite literally materialize whatever you so desire into the real world without any opposition. One way or another, you will succeed – even if it’s not the way you had once originally envisioned it to be like.

I think the beautiful thing about life right now is that we’re living in a very unique period of vast-knowledge and also a time of grave uncertainty. It is a clash of both something good and something incredibly bad. Of course, that’s how life usually works. There must always be a Yang to every Yin. No matter how bad we want life to be this easy road to success, we have to remember that reality is much harsher than that. We must make sacrifices in order to achieve whatever it is that we want. We must also remember that we must put in the necessary time in order to make things work.

For example, my older brother who is just about to turn 31 years old, has had a plan set in motion since he was 20. He has already completed college with a degree in graphic designing. But he’s content with his job, which is working at the local supermarket. He has gained about 12 years already with his store, and he plans to retire from there and eventually find another job to coincide with his retirement checks from the supermarket. This is something that he has actively worked at and I am really proud of him. Of course, other people may see this as a failure, but I see it as an achievement. He’s part of a union, and he’ll likely never get fired or laid-off, so he has more security in his job than many other people his age. That is certainly something to be proud of, especially since we live in an age of massive instability.

I digress though, back to the main topic at hand.

In times of darkness, we are faced with a multitude of personal questions which we must answer in order to move ahead in our own lives.

Like; where do I want to be in 5 years? In 10 years?

What kind of lifestyle do I want to live by?

Do I want to be married and have kids one day soon? Or am I a free spirit who would rather travel around America or the world?

These are the kinds of questions we must all ask ourselves as we grow older and more aware of our own surroundings. Life has never been easy or simple; that’s the truth of it. That’s why every time I hear “why do humans have to make life so difficult” I merely laugh to myself in silence. Humans were meant to make life difficult. We aren’t a docile or even quiet breed of creatures. We are intelligent, proud, and even opinionated (some more than others). EVERYONE’s lives are difficult, no matter what kind of government system we have. no matter what societal rules we construct, and no matter what expectations we place on our people.

Life for humans was never designed to be “simple” or “easy”. It was created to be challenging. It was meant to be a life-or-death experience. It was meant to be cherished and scorned. Life for humans was meant to be a life-long journey wrought with happiness and pain all mixed together. To push ourselves further than we could ever imagine. Life is a roller-coaster with only one end, that being death. So you might as well get out there and take life by the horns.

Nobody will make that choice for you; only you can make those hard decisions in life yourself.

That’s what I think is a potential problem with our modern day society. Our parents, grandparents, etc., etc., have really coddled us into being “too soft”. Four years ago, I was a completely different man than I am today. Sometimes I can’t even begin to fathom how I used to be. I would have never survived in the world by myself if I never evolved and matured. And even still, I have much left to learn and grow from. That’s a natural process to life after all. If you try and stop the inevitable change from happening, than you’ll never be fully prepared for what life has to offer us.

In times of darkness, there are moments which escape us that can never be recalled again. If we let slip those opportunities of hardship, we may never grow if we don’t accept the challenges that await us on the other side.

I once dated a girl for 3 years who was older than me and was afraid to live life. She was shy, a bit on the quiet side, and wasn’t completely sure of herself. Rest assured, after the 3 years we were together, she had blossomed into a woman who was sure of herself and of her goals in life. She wanted to go to New York City and live there; she wanted to experience and learn new things in life beyond college since she finished. She wanted to become an active participant in her own life story. That’s what I love to see; growth. Even though it didn’t work out for us, and we had our differences, I’m still glad that I was able to get her out of her shell. Whoever ends up with her as a partner will be very lucky to have her. She was an incredible young woman, and had become very communicative and open.

Things happen in life; and as you go through changes in your own life, you’ll begin to see the differences around you. You’ll begin to see the many different possibilities out there for you to grab. You’ll begin to understand that you’re bound to make mistakes. More importantly, you’ll begin to appreciate living your life a little more than you might take for granted now.

Conclusively, I think it’s safe to say that you owe it to yourself to go do that thing you’ve always wanted to do. Start that project you’ve always wanted to finish; see where it leads you. Perhaps you’ve always wanted to travel yourself; starting making a financial goal for your traveling needs. It’s never too late to start something new; we as human beings are never done learning. We are ever-evolving and always learning new concepts, ideas, and truths. Don’t let the fear of failure overrule your desire to try something new. That’s the biggest issue in the world, and especially at a time of vast uncertainty as we’re currently facing in our world, there really is no better time to get started on your life then right now.

So go out there and make a difference, even if it’s a small one. After all, all great things in the world have relatively small and insignificant beginnings.

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

Arkanim: Tales of the Enlightened Ones

Hello everyone! It’s me R.S. Noel coming to you with another post. For today, I’m going to make it short and also provide another excerpt from Arkanim: Tales of the Enlightened Ones. This is another work-in-progress book that I’ve been writing for a while now. To be honest, this is the very first work-in-progress book I had originally started on when I was young. But through the years, growing-up got the better of me, and I had put this story aside.

Now, however, it’s come into my life once again.

 

The following is a work-in-progress by me, R.S. Noel. I hold and maintain all the rights for the work presented below. Thank you for your interest and understanding. Enjoy!:

 

It was growing. All around her, she could hear the sounds of light footsteps, of silent windy whispers gliding through the jungle’s vines, of the many different sounds of nature that were now engulfing the foreigners. Rhea couldn’t distinguish between what noise belonged to a human and what noise belonged to the wild life of these unruly jungles.

There was no doubt in her mind that they were being watched closely, it was only a matter of time before something immensely uncertain happened.

Rhea could hear Merthus beginning to breath slightly faster now as the boy had undoubtedly noticed the subtle changes in the Flurrus Jungle as well. Rhea wished at this very moment that she could just comfort the small child, but she knew that it was hopeless to even pretend that everything was all right. She knew that they just needed to survive through this experience. Their lives had become nothing more than the basic instinct of survival. Nothing else mattered; just their willpower to make it out of this mess alive.

Moving a bit quicker through the narrow path they were walking upon, Rhea could tell that Zante was increasingly growing worried as he appeared to turn his head slightly left and right from time to time. Rhea knew that the man was surely trying to figure out if the hidden Urksinians were going to show themselves right now or not.

She knew now at this very moment that Zante Qitzo truly did care for their wellbeing. If Rhea had any doubts before, they were put to rest as her eyes maintained a steady gaze on the back of Zante’s head. This was the only thing that Rhea could manage to look at, as she feared trying to avert her gaze even slightly away towards the noises that were only continuing to grow around her. It would only serve to bring more trouble to them.

In the distance from this curving road riddled with dark soil, Rhea could see two large arching gates that were closed shut. She could not see beyond that point, as there appeared to be plenty of large vines and roots covering the otherwise visible sight of the village certainly behind the gates.

Some of Rhea’s hair covered her face lightly now, as a tailwind swept to the left side of her. She knew that this was no natural occurrence. Her eyes grew wide with fascination. Someone was running unimaginably fast now behind the veil of the thick jungle life to her left. Rhea did not dare to remove her hair from her face, as she now looked dead straight ahead without even entertaining the thought that she could look elsewhere. Her eyes were wide with paralyzed fear. She knew her inner fear was showing, and she cursed very silently underneath her breath as she wished for nothing else but to hide such vulnerable emotions.

It was without question that Rhea, Merthus, and Dasca were simply not welcomed here. Even before she had seen any of the Urksinians within the village of Kinkuly itself, Rhea was now starting to understand the workings of different people from different parts of the world.

As the group neared closer to the heavily vegetated gates that surely led into the village of Kinkuly, Rhea could see four guardsmen standing ever so silently amongst the vines. Rhea had not seen them before, and likely because they were wearing armor that was the same shade of green as the verdant gates. She was in awe at how unmoving they were, better than statues. Certainly the messenger that Zante had sent ahead of them had let these guardsmen know that they were nearing the village. And by they, Rhea knew she was thinking more along the lines of Dasca, Merthus, and herself.

Gorgirians were not exactly on friendly terms with Urksinians.

Rhea could feel the intensity of those behind her, as she momentarily shut her eyes to allow her fears to subside just a little more.

Then, that’s when it happened.

Jumping from the many trees that were grouped tightly together on both sides of the narrow path – came down about nine native Urksinians. They all appeared intimidating and full of untapped energy. Most of them were men, broad shouldered and towering in size. About two of them were Urksinian women, still equally intimidating with their bulging muscles and unfamiliar physiques.

Yet it was one of the Urksinian men that started to walk straight up to Zante that really caught Rhea’s fearful attention. This man had the broadest of shoulders amongst the newfound Urksinians, thick arms the size of tree trunks, and powerful legs that could likely crush even a newborn gorgus.

He landed squarely in front of Zante as he stared at the man with an unflinching gaze that appeared to bulge out with deep hatred. “Zante Qitzovena’lu hega nemno qora-dod belsion!” [Zante Qitzo…you’ve come back home with slaves in tow!].

Though Rhea had no idea what this unknown new man had just said, she could tell Zante was guarding any sign of emotions as he responded back clearly and with a deepened voice. “Jersde leme’neleno, cirlee; nem belsion.” [They are foreigners, guests; not slaves].

 

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

 

Source of Photo: (Click Me to View Photo Credits)

A New Writer

To be a new writer is to be born into this world for the first time ever.

It is to experience the wonders of such light and dark places. It is a thrill, a wave of feelings and emotions which drown you until you are reborn again, over and over. The process never changes, and the feelings never fade away. Yet new emotions will always take over old ones; making your heart beat wildly with silent joy, with unheard excitement, with untold fears. It all builds up in momentum and tempo, as you begin your journey with gusto and zeal.

To be a new writer means to stumble and make mistakes. Mistakes, however, that need to be made. Because without mistakes, there is no progress. Without imperfections, you will never attain the true potential housed deep within your heart, soul, and mind. To stumble recklessly and with feverish devout, is to be a new writer.

To find your voice, and your path, is what makes us new writers.

To see other people for the first time; to really see them, is what makes us new writers. 

We may never meet, yet I feel as though I’ve known you my whole life. We share an interest, a singular experience known to us as writing. What makes us so unique is this experience alone. We are the scholars of the world, the educators of generations yet to come into existence, and the dreamers for those who are not fortunate enough.

We teach others what life is truly all about. To remind people that if we were to lose everything; society, materialism, structure – all that is left is us.

Us; who have felt naked and lost for centuries upon centuries.

Us; who have been misunderstood by those who are not in-touch with their human emotions and thoughts.

Us; the truth seekers of the very fabrications that make up our collective existence.

This is what it means to be a new writer.

It is, to be human.

This picture you see in the header, is the very same one I took one year ago when I embarked on my final journey to become a writer for life. I’ve never looked back since that day I made this singular promise with myself. Life has never been the same since then.

I can feel the sun’s rays falling on my shoulders as I make my way down this familiar path.

This place, which I will not name, is the single place I come to whenever I have the free time to do so. To be able to wonder and imagine all the different worlds and lives I can experience life through. To be lucky enough to see different people for who they truly are at the core of their beings. To find strange and quizzical creatures who have a mind of their own. The gardens I get to walk through are timeless, the forests I can explore with my imagination take me to places I never knew existed; and most importantly, the lakeside that resides in this mysterious place holds a special place in my soul.

I can only imagine what life would be like if I never began writing.

I would probably never know the true meaning of friendship, or the real depths of hard-earned love. I would have never sought out to make a difference in this sometimes very estranged world. I would have never felt the need to stop time in my life and truly work on the only thing that has ever held any relevance in the world of reality.

Because in the end, all that really matters is you and I.

Don’t you ever forget yourself, or the power you hold inside. Because at the end of the day, only our memories and emotions for those who have passed, and for those who have yet to come, are the only things in life worth fighting for.

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

Photo credit: (picture taken by me)

An Ode to Her Soul

The soul of her existence inspired life in me.

The energy of her presence reminded me of the true meaning of life’s quarrels.

Her unique aura reminded me of a time when chaos and harmony clashed together to create beautiful and wicked life as it once was before.

Her doubts and insecurities reminded me that we’re all just humans full of emotions which I may never fully understand and will never completely appreciate.

But my manhood is the compliment of her womanhood. Her soul is the Yin and my mind is the Yang. Her ethereal being is the light to my darker reality which I will never show her. Her blossoming life force is what attracts people to gather together and become happier. My life force reminds people of the necessary harshness of our natural world and order.

My coarse hands interlace with her soft and reassuring palms. Her existence is both significant to me and a nuisance. For she is both as necessary as the air we breathe; and ironically so, she is also the metaphorical pain in my heart reminding me that we must deal with emotions even if we wish emotions could just disappear.

Her emotional intelligence far exceeds my mathematical mindset. Her natural intuition senses things I’ll never see. In contrast, the man’s perception of the physical life we live will never quite phase her own life force. For her heart is beyond the physical manifestations of our being. Woman is not of bleak reality. No, she is of boundless creativity ready to burst open at the seams with unapologetic life.

Yet she also has a strange way of keeping me grounded when I begin to try and live past the physical manifestation of this existence. For I will never know the world a woman lives in; and I’ve accepted that I am okay with such a truth.

I will never know her secrets, her wisdom, her thoughts, or her own personal desires for a truly balanced life.

But in that same regard, she will never know the secrets I know, the adventures I go on, or the memories created. She will never know the many loves of my life. For even though she is a huge part of my life- she isn’t my entire life. I appreciate her existence and presence, but I also must have my own space just as much as she needs hers.

I feel selfish, and I wish I didn’t feel this way.

But life is about the golden memories we create, not the overarching society. It’s about enduring through the pains and heartache and remembering that as a man, I can’t afford to stop and remorse for lost loved ones.

For the same society that hinders her personal freedoms, also forbids my emotions and thoughts. For she may not realize it yet; but her existence far exceeds my own. She is the bearer of all human life, and I am merely a man. A man who can certainly do great things; but does not care for pandering to the society which holds us all back.

For I champion not my own success, but the success of brighter and smarter individuals. We are all faced with adversity, and in this ever-changing world full of automation and machine; I have reverted back to being human. I have been reminded of the true world of possibilities and imagination once again. It rests with humans, not with machines.

Through these last couple of years, I’ve come to realize that a woman’s life is full of so many interesting, sad, funny, horrifying, amazing, unique, and miscellaneous moments. Her existence is one of pure good and evil. She lives knowing the truth of our being, knowing that humans are her children to raise. To know that the world will one day take her children’s innocence away without her consent or forewarning. She knows that all of her loved ones will fade away, and one day, she will find herself alone and reminded of our boring, bleak, and uneventful reality.

But unlike man; she will also have her own secret memories to cherish forevermore through time immemorial.

And moreover, she still has purpose in her life. She will guide the hand of the misguided, the abandoned, and the forgotten. For she will remain steadfast in her judgment of what’s truly right and what is wickedly wrong. For even though my own judgment may be clouded by unchanging circumstances a man must go trough in his life; she will fight with a voice mightier than any lion; louder than any howling wind, and more potent than any poison. For her words sting the hardest, grow the thickest, and blossom the brightest. For she has a way with her presence that sways me to secretly believe her every word. Love has a funny way of blinding a man from otherwise obvious signs of danger or misgivings.

I know she will never truly understand a man’s world – but at the end of the day, as long as we both know that our love burns brightly in this small moment in time; then I can live with the fact that we may never see each other again.

My days are filled with meaning only because of her joy. My sorrows only exist because of her true and feigned emotions. My heart only beats due to the boundless love and bottomless anger she makes me feel at times. It’s passion, and I don’t know what I would do without her love. I would find another, and another, and another. For I could never live without a woman’s love. A woman’s love is the purest form of love there is in the world. She may not realize it right now, but her heart and her thoughts are what makes this world magical again.

We see eye-to-eye and understand that we will forever be at-odds. She understands we have roles to play; temporary parts to a fading play. She knows that this lifetime is short, so she makes the best of her days. I may have just realized my own mortality; but she knew of death the moment she realized she could create life.

I could go on about my admiration and amazement at woman’s existence; but I won’t. I know she understands our existential manifestation, and our never-ending love for passion. She knows man is nothing with woman, and in that same regard- even if she never voices it; she understands that life would be meaningless without man’s toil and aggression.

But in the end, when the curtains of this fading play finally drape down at the end; I will die knowing that I’ll never find another one of her. She was my first love, and she’ll forever be my last.

 

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

 

Source of photo: (click me to view photo credits!)

HALLOWEEN: A Time of Infinite and Unyielding Creativity!

Well, it’s my favorite time of the year again! Being inspired at a young age from the inquisitive and creative nature of Halloween, I’ve always had a deep-rooted adoration for everything and anything spooky, magical, and haunting on this most special of days.

From the days of being an advent reader (and watcher) of the Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling, to going outside and causing mayhem in the streets of my hometown with my “angel”-like friends, to binge-watching anything even remotely terrifying [Texas Chainsaw Massacre (Original), Halloween (Series), A Nightmare on Elm Street, The Shinning, etc.]; Halloween for me has correlated with the one time out of the year where I could enjoy the company of those closest to me.

In recent years, it has represented something more special however. Halloween, to me, represents a time of reflection on the history of the world.

For some reason or another, I’ve been taking Halloween as a time to remember all of the different key moments in our world’s history. To the magnificent Roman Empire that Augustus Caesar created, to the days of ancient China and her rule of ruthlessness, to the history behind Stonehenge; Halloween has recently held a very special place in my heart for reasons unlike what it is celebrated for. It has become the one time out of the year where I can genuinely reflect upon things otherwise forgotten.

As the days meld into years, and as I grow older and realize my mortality is upon me; I’ve begun to feel a deeper connection to even the most seemingly insignificant of aspects to life. I feel one with the world during this holiday. I’m reminded of all the boundless sources of creativity awaiting to be tapped into; waiting to be explored through.

I feel like a kid again; running around and jumping into the fallen autumn leaves. I feel the cold-winds of preemptive Winter calling my name; reminding me of life’s cycle of life and death.

It makes me feel adventurous; it makes me feel like I can take on the whole world all at once and live through such an experience.

It makes me aggressive again. It rekindles an almost dim fire within me. It reminds me of my long-forgotten ambitions. Though I am 24 years old, I feel like a spritely 99 year old man. I feel as though I have conquered ancient ruins, ethereal jungles, and expansive deserts.

It fills me with dreamy images of teleporting back in time to an existence on Earth when temples were pristine and civilization was just at the root of fruition. I close my eyes and wonder what fate has in store for the world.

I can feel the strange winds now; an unfamiliar ocean breeze filled with air so crisp not even I can recognize it.

As I reopen my eyes, I can see dirt-filled faces marred with unsettling fear. I remember that life for our collective ancestors was one likely ruled by lies, deceit, and deception.

For all the natural beauty around, though, I quickly lose myself in Earth’s bounty.

I escape.

I run away from civilization, make a trail of my own. I feel the whiplash of the winds now as it basks me with new purpose.

I rise.

I find my footing in stranger lands, filled with stranger people still.

I meet new allies, new companions as well who accompany me on my travels to foolishly change the world. But I’m young at heart; nothing can stop me. Not even an emperor or dictator. Nothing stands in the way of my desire for freedom of choice for all human beings on Earth. Nothing sways my unyielding resolve. I fight for the people, sacrificing myself at any cost possible.

You see, I feel like myself again on Halloween. For one reason or another, I feel connected to everyone around me during this time of the year. There’s something deeper and darker to life, yet the light beneath such a void is yet one undiscovered. 

Though I may never live to see happier days for our civilization, I will always continue to use my creative force for change. No matter how small, or how large, it may be; I will always honor the creativity that comes along with Halloween.

With that said; may you and yours truly have a fun-filled Halloween! I hope you enjoy your time with your family, friends, and close acquaintances. Remember that life only holds meaning when shared with those who love you, and who you love back.

And whenever you’re in doubt, just look up to the sky and wonder. Let your imagination run wild every once in a while. Who knows, maybe you’ll go on the adventure of a lifetime…

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

Source of photo: (click me to view photo credits)!

Music Monday! – As I Write

Welcome to my new series Music Monday! This series will be the very harbinger of what I listen to whenever I write stories of fiction. It’s a recording and a collection of the best inspiring music which has had a variety of effects on me. Depending on what I’m writing, I usually listen to one of three types of genres. The first, is that of daring adventure. The second, is one of immense tragedy or sorrow. And the third, is usually that of intensely dark or twisted music.

Here’s a sample of what I’m listening to at the moment as I write. I would also advise you wear headphones if you do decide to check out the music. You can hear every single piece of note and instrument being played out much better this way: (Click me to listen to music via youtube).

The thundering sounds of suspense, the endless waves of emotions that comes with the monumental encounters of life; these are the moments I live for. At times, when I’m writing a scene that is full of blinding twists and endless turns, I find myself gladly overcome by a huge amount of adrenaline which washes over me and nearly drowns me in the expanse of life’s many outcomes. It’s an onslaught of events, back-to-back-to-back; and I love every minute of it.

A lead-up to an even larger event; which leads to a different path and an outcome unseen; until the crescendo is met near the end of each main plot-line. These are the moments I live for as a writer.

It’s so strong, so intense, that my fingers are typing just in-tempo with the blinding speed of succession of the heart-pounding scene unfolding in front of my mind’s eye. Though I can barely keep up with the pace of my rapidly-changing brain patterns as the story comes to me through some sixth sense, or God-knows what else; I am rewarded when I finish each scene. Though I may have exhausted all sources of energyreserve within my soul; once I finish a scene, I see the hard-work that actually goes into it. Like any good story, there is a definitive “beginning”, “middle”, and “end”.

There are countless and numerous tracks that I listen to; and with this series, I’m hoping that I can record them all. I know it might be near-impossible, since there are so many tracks that I listen to while I write.

But with every track played, I get that much closer to finding closure in each story I write.

Writing is such a sacred art. It consist of concentration on a level that many of us are not comfortable with. It can cause a sort of distancing mechanism in writers, and many times, it can even cause extreme cases of isolation. Yet that’s what makes writing so intriguing. Like many other forms of expression; writing can produce works of living art. And if you’re lucky enough to know how to work through the social environment of the movie industry, you may even see your own book turned into a movie.

In the end though, one must remember to balance out their lives. Because, as the saying goes: “everything in moderation”. Or else you can very well find yourself somewhat deranged and mentally exhausted.

During my breaks between writing, I keep each story deep within the confinements of my mind; since nowadays, I’m focused more on school-work then I am with my true interest, which rests in writing.

In some way, that’s why I started this website/blog. I wanted a place where I could jot down my thoughts on different topics. Probably the best surprise, was that it also helped me connect with countless people with interesting life-stories and backgrounds full of inquisitive knowledge. It’s led me to this amazing network full of other passionate writers, photographers, travelers, and hobbyists. It’s led me down a path which I am all-too glad to walk upon.

There are certainly many things left unsaid in this post, but for today, I believe it’s the right time to end this piece.

God bless all of you, and I hope you have a fine rest of your day, (or night)!

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

Source of photo: (click me to view photo credits)!