1 Year Anniversary!

On By rsnoelIn Blog Posts, Online Journal Entries, Realism Posts, truth, Uncategorized13 Comments

(click anywhere on this sentence to view credit for this photo!)

Today marks the 365th day of me blogging! It’s been such an amazing ride here on WordPress’ network and I’m incredibly happy to have met so many great people on here during my first year of blogging.

I want to thank everyone that has supported me through this year. Through all of the hectic changes in my life, I think it’s best to say I’m blessed to still have a roof over my head. Life was never supposed to be fair, but this year of blogging (and living my life in general), taught me that nothing is ever guaranteed. Through a combination of luck, wit, charm, hard-work, and a dozen-or-so other traits; life is truly a rollercoaster full of unexpected twists and turns.

Thinking on it now, I suppose now would be the best time for you, my readers and audience members, to really get to know the man behind R.S. Noel.

Here are some questions I’ve composed to answer (with short and lengthy responses!).

For starters: why did I even start this website/blog?

Well, the short answer is that I felt the need to fill a gap in my time. I once had a lot of free-time and was able to express myself creatively more frequently then I do today.

The long answer? I’m an aspiring author who wants to publish a book (or 2, or 3….or 64)! I have an innate passion for writing, and I found my creative outlet here on WordPress’ network of other bloggers/photographers/creative minds. It’s awesome to be able to check the different articles/posts that go up each-and-every-day; and to see what’s happening with different people around the world. Often times, we all focus too much on other “things” that don’t really amount to much in the end – but writing is just one of those expressive means of creativity that really sticks with me.

I suppose you can say that I was “cursed” with this certainly wonderful gift when I was about 9 years old. I had often times felt frustrated when I was child because I had trouble speaking orally. I had a speech-impediment. It was pretty serious, and it caused me to go “into my shell” for about 2 or so years (before I hit puberty). During those dark years, I found solace in watching movies, playing video games, going on long walks near by apartment complex, and occasionally even drawing.

But the one hobby that really struck a cord with me was writing.

For you see; when I started writing, I would eventually come to acknowledge that small time period of my life as the beginning of what would eventually be self-dubbed as “The Golden Era” of my life.

The very first story I wrote; ended up being the very same story I’m almost finished editing today. Though I am nearly done editing said-book, I know the process will be a long and arduous road to getting traditionally published. Not to mention that this book is part of a series of 6 other books. But perhaps my biggest obstacles are not in the fictional world; but in the real one.

I don’t have any family members who are acclaimed writers; I don’t really have any connections in the publishing community, and moreover, I’ve done countless research on the matter of publishing and have realized that I need to grow a substantial audience before I can even hope of truly getting the recognition I believe this book deserves. It’s a road which many would consider “suicidal” or “a waste of time”, but I believe it’s worth a shot; even as I work on the other aspects of my life.

Another question I suppose is worth answering is: what other hobbies do I enjoy partaking in?

The short answer?: Youtube! (And also watching different films, playing video games, talking long walks in strange forests, and spending time with the people I love the most).

Time for the long answer!

Over the last 2 weeks or so, I’ve completely revamped my Youtube channel. I’ve incorporated trailer reviews, and will also be doing movie reviews as well (as the movies start rolling out)!

I used to do video game compilation videos, where I would post a collage of humorous moments. Those videos would get 100,000 views (and more). But for some reason, I quickly felt disenchanted with making those types of videos due to a lack of creativity needed in order to make them. Anyone can make compilation videos, even a kid could do it. So I decided about 2 weeks ago to get rid of all of my old content and focus on creating self-made content that felt more original in terms of the production process. Because let’s face it; clipping together random video scenes from live-streamers is no fun for the long-haul.

So, I’ve gladly made the change and haven’t looked back since. My first (new) video was uploaded only a couple of days ago; and all of the subsequent trailer reaction videos that I’ve produced since then have gradually seen a small rise in viewership (which gets me excited every time as I realize that some of those people are actually coming back to see what I have to say about different movie trailers)!

Moving on now; phew!

Third question to answer: what are you currently doing in your real life?

Well this question is pretty straight forward. I’m doing what any other sensible (and lucky) young person would be doing during this time period of his life.

I’m double majoring in Accounting and Financing; and potentially minoring in Computer & Information Science.

That was the short answer; the long answer is…

About a year-and-a-half ago, I decided to go back to college. I had initially started my college journey back when I was 19 years old. After taking a single semester, I decided to take about 4 years off (originally, it was just 2 years…but life happened, as I will explain shortly). I worked full time at my local supermarket (Ralphs), and generally just had a good time hanging out with childhood friends and making the best of my situation. Fast-forward to turning 23, I realized I was in a rut.

I had no specialized skills that this ever-changing workforce in America is requiring of its people nowadays. At best, I was a decent-enough writer who worked at a local supermarket by day; and wrote by night. Because you see, I wrote the majority of my time when I was younger. What also caused my original “2-year” hiatus from college was the relationship I found myself deeply infatuated in. I had a solid 3-year relationship with a girl who was about 3-and-a-half years my senior. We had the time of our lives then. Even though we didn’t have much, we had each other during tough times. We both worked at the same place too, so it was nice to be able to hang out from time-to-time.

Then shit hit the proverbial fan.

I realized when I was 23 years old, that the relationship couldn’t last forever. The reason being? I was on a fast-track to going absolutely nowhere. I had managed to accrue about $10,000 in debt (now down to about $7,500 – spread out across two credit cards). Not to mention, I had also failed miserably in terms of living up to the “standards” of society. I was still living with my parents, I had a 1992 Toyota Tercel (and still do; it works perfectly fine), and I felt like I had wasted possibly the best-years of my life.

It was around this time I knew I had to go back to school. I had to do something (anything really) with my still young life.

So with about 2 weeks of planning out my future life, I called up the girl I was seeing at the time and told her I needed to talk with her in person.

She had a feeling where this was going; as is the nature of women at times.

So instead, I broke it off with her over the phone since she didn’t want to waste her time (and mine) by having me drive down to her house, or for her to drive up to where I live.

So, we had a quick break-up. I thought (naively) I would magically feel better.

But I was not prepared for the ramifications.

It took me a good 4-5 months to recuperate after that breakup. She was my first (for everything), and I couldn’t manage to get myself out of the deep depression which took a-hold of me during that summer of 2016. I remember vividly going to work almost everyday and feeling useless and meaningless. It had gotten so bad, that at one point, I had to place my 2-week notice. Miraculously, the next school semester was going to start in about 3 weeks, so I signed up for 5 classes (ended up dropping one class due to my depression), and passed that semester with 3 “A’s” and 1 “B”. I don’t really know how I managed to pull that off, especially because I didn’t feel motivated at all. Looking back now, I remember immersing myself into the material from each of my classes and really delving deep into the knowledge-base provided by each professor.

Fast-forward to late 2017.

I managed to get through all of my lower-division classes, and currently working on my Accounting and Financing classes that I need to complete in order to get into the upper division for both majors.

The only other lower-division class I need is Calculus for Business. But that will be easy for me to complete since I’m taking it over the span of 2 classes this year. 

Otherwise from that, I’ve somehow managed to position myself to at least obtaining a somewhat decent standard of living through my majors; I’ve managed to learn how to finance my daily, weekly, and monthly expenses; and I’ve learned the true value of utilizing every single minute of a day.

Though I certainly miss the days of carefree expression and being able to “take it easy”; I wouldn’t change what I have right now for anything. I’ve learned so many valuable things through my dedication and hard-work. I’ve learned how to appreciate the little that I do have, and I’ve learned how to be a better son even through tough times.

I know I may not have a private yacht, or own property; but what I do know, is this: I’m the happiest I’ve ever been in my entire life. I know someday I will do something (anything) with my life, and for the time being, I will continue to focus on the little foundation that I have built up for myself so far.

And with that; I believe it’s the best time to end this lengthy post!

Thank you again to all of my supporters, readers, and friends! I’ve especially enjoyed getting to know some of you throughout the last several months, and I look forward to hopefully seeing where life takes all of us. Whether we hit a couple of “bumps” along the road, or whether we have manage to “fail” at something; what matters the most in the end – is the community of like-minded individuals we all find ourselves a part of.

May my 2nd year of blogging be as-equally-as fun and interesting as this one was!

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

24 Years.

On By rsnoelIn Blog Posts, Online Journal Entries, Realism Posts, truth, Uncategorized25 Comments

(song which inspired this post; click anywhere on this sentence to listen to track).

 

24 Years.

24 years and I’ve finally “figured it out”.

I’ve finally uncovered the “secret of life”.

You see; I tried with all of my might to quell the mounting roar in my soul.

I tried with all of my inner-power to calm the unchained flames which burned me up from inside, every night for the past 24 years.

I tried with all of my knowledge and creativity, to understand those human beings who have chosen to be inconsiderate and dismissive of others.

I tried to fight with everything I had in me, to understand what would possess one soul to irrevocably harm another.

I tried and waited with all of the worldly patience inside of me, to see why you and I have been put against each other, in this society we call “home”; in order to fight each other to the death.

I’ve tried, and tried,….and I’ve tried.

And with all of this waiting around I’ve been doing for the last 24 years, I’ve come to only one simple conclusion.

You must become the thing you so despise.

The reason for this?

Put simply: no matter what your goals, aspirations, or inner-drives are; you will achieve none of it if you stand idly by.

If you don’t move forward, even when everyone around you has lost hope in you, and even when everyone around you is constantly trying to shove you back down- the only thing that matters is that you never give up on yourself.

Fuck all the times someone has told you that you would amount to “absolutely nothing”. 

Fuck the people who try and ruin you.

Fuck society and what is expected of you.

But when everything is said-and-done, what matters the most, is that you shove them back. You tell them that they’ve amounted to “nothing”. Most importantly, and above all else, you must take back your power by accepting the harsh reality that you must start at rock-bottom again.

For even though you have become so familiar with rock-bottom, you haven’t truly experienced the bottom until you’ve been shunned away, have been rejected by society, and have been left for dead at the corner of “Your Future” and “Your Past”.

So what does this all mean?

We must realize that our past pains and current corruptions are the only forces fueling our existence. It is what keeps us going forward, whether we realize it or not.

We are walking and talking contradictions.

But the irony of it all; is that, this is how we must be in order to survive in this jungle we call societal life. We cannot show our true selves with 100% accuracy; for if we did, we would be pushed aside for fake friends, fake allies, and fake realities. We cannot show our humanity, for we will just as quickly be labeled as “inaccurate, naïve, stupid, childish, and worthless”.

After all, that’s what any modernized society would want; right? For every single person to turn into a heartless creature of the night. To go against our moral judgments and to make decisions irrationally and without justified cause. To accuse people without concrete fact. To point fingers at our enemies in the hopes they perish away. To treat those who are not in positions of power; like they are the very dirt we walk upon.

Don’t try and tell me otherwise, for I know the truth now that I’ve lived through these cold experiences during the 24 years of my existence so far.

This reality we have created for each other is one wrought in drought. It’s one spun in which we can no longer be humane. It’s one transfixed in which the end days have arrived.

In comparison to the truth of our existence; we must present ourselves opposite of that truth. We must show to the world that we have all the money in the world; that we own multiple properties, that we have conquered the world by being cruel, mean-spirited, and full of vengeance and fury.

When in reality, we are just one paycheck away from complete destitution and destruction. When in reality, we are lonely beyond any child’s comprehension. When in reality, we are as fragile as the rose which sways alongside the rhythm of the winds.

We are, after all, human.

24 years down this road; and this is what I’ve realized after all this time.

 

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

 

Source of photo: (click me to view picture credits)

Transformation

On By rsnoelIn Blog Posts, Realism Posts, truth, UncategorizedLeave a comment

(Inspiration for this poetic piece, click me to listen to song)

Transformation

I feel myself disconnecting from who I am.

Who I am….

Who I…………..was?

I’m beginning to wonder: what’s wrong with me? 

Why am I losing pieces of myself?

Why are those pieces floating out of my consciousness like a stream of water flowing downstream at an unimaginably blinding speed?

I see you. 

I…..saw you?

I’m beginning to wonder if I’m starting to see you or if I’m beginning to see…….my own reflection?

Like a kaleidoscope of dizzying colors, my once dreary eyes are beginning to see the faint lights of ever-changing fates.

To see the potential of you and I. To feel the winds of unspoken truths caress my face with faulty lies.

I’ve begun to speak in my dreams of feverish nightmares borne of an indifference to what’s going on in our shared world.

I’ve begun to distance myself from who we are meant to be.

I’ve broken our promise.

I’m sorry.

I’m so incredibly sorry.

I feel like I failed who I was meant to be.

And yet…

Yet my future is bright.

What does that even mean?

Why do we cherish those who have “made it”?

One day.

One day, I swear on my very soul.

I will live my truth.

I will change this world, even if for just a flash of a moment.

I will change the collective consciousness of our society for just a second in history.

I will defend the honor of what it means to truly survive and thrive in this world, I will remind myself of why I still breathe.

No doubt the best of humanity dies young; for the old and aging continue to live and support this world full of deception and abuse. I should know, I’m becoming such a thing. Such a creature of the night.

Why haven’t I ended it all for myself?

I don’t feel suicidal. That’s likely the reason why. But still…why am I playing along with this game?

I can’t stop myself either. I’m filled with determination unlike anything of this world. But…why? Why am I so competitive? Why am I so determined? Even though I don’t wish to be, I just am?

Confusing thoughts spiral in my mind as a wave of over-confidence washes over me…or is it doubt?

But I’m not indecisive; though I wish I was at this moment.

I wish I was more confused than I’m playing it out to be.

I wish I could come up with some excuse; some tainted truth.

Thoughts intertwined with hallowed emotions. I don’t actually feel anything at this moment. I’ve become numb. And yet, my heart still beats? It beats with life, with the ever-pulsing rhythm of life.

Why has our world succumb to such devastation and derelict woes?

Why, why, why, why, why, why.

Our voices are drowned out, our opinions are non-existent, and our stories will forever be untold.

The truth will forever glimmer in the moonlit sky like a long-forgotten wish. The truth will flicker as a lone candle does in the dead of night. The truth will be unseen like the silent bird which has no voice to sing. The truth will exist, but only for itself alone. It will never be comforted, never be hugged with delight or cherished for its unique characteristics. It will never be able to shine so brightly that the sun, and the moon, and all the stars are meaningless to the bountiful life on Earth.

The truth will forever remain unclaimed. Forever untouched and despised. For truth brings inconvenience. It fosters a sense of hostility between two souls. It reminds all of us of our inevitable death. It reminds us that life is so precious; yet we are wasting it away day-in-and-day-out by working away at a job which holds no meaning to our true community; our true loved-ones.

The truth is harsh.

It is cruel and cold.

Like the nights of cold-sweat drenching your body; it is unforgiving and relentless. Like the days full of addiction and of growing numbness to life; rejection of truth brings about the calamity of your very existence. Like the darkening sky full of dread, or the mysterious secrets veraciously biting away at your soul as you try and reason and bargain with darker realities. Truth untouched is like a baby without her mother. It is like an unheard cry in the middle of nowhere. It is like the blood-thirsty eyes of a feral creature ready to devour it’s prey.

It is like the breaking of glass, as the world comes shattering down upon the weight of our lies.

But…

Once acknowledge and accepted; truth transforms it’s once ugly disguise into a beautiful soul.

Dancing in the light of day, truth can once again show us the way to salvation and holiness.

It can help us become worthy of being named children of goodness. Children of the righteous path – even if it isn’t always the easiest one.

Truth……

Truth can set us free again.

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

 

Source of photo: (click me to view picture credits)

Life in the Philippines

On By rsnoelIn Blog Posts, Online Journal Entries, Realism Posts, Uncategorized3 Comments

Recently, while I was in my Economics 102 class; my professor was discussing the time she spent in the Philippines with her family for 2 months during the summer of her Sophomore year transitioning to her Junior year of college. This was a part of our lesson on differing “economic growths” amongst countries. She was telling us that she had always been interested in listening to the news and also reading news articles on global affairs. This would certainly be a lesson I never forgot.

Certainly then, she must have expected that her trip to her family’s home country would be one of interesting encounters and experiences.

She told us that the moment they landed in Manila (the capital of the Philippines), her family and her could already see the heavy military presence roaming throughout the airport and the streets of the capital city. She remembered vividly picking up a newspaper during the walk, and reading about some governmental issues that were growing worse by the day.

This experience she had, happened in 2011-2012. Certainly, times in the Philippines have changed since then. In some ways, life in the Phillipines has become similar to life in the U.S., in that the economy is lagging a bit, and many working-aged individuals are finding it increasingly difficult to find permanent and somewhat consistent work.

At any rate, she remembered also reading about the drug problem the Philippines was faced with; and how the government was dealing with it. In truth, the government in the Philippines was dealing with this problem in a rather “direct” manner. The military had been given orders by the then-President Benigno Aquino III. He had told the military to “gun-down” any drug trafficking going on, and any drug users caught in the act.

Certainly, this kind of dictation of extreme orders was not taken lightly. It was seen as quite the upset throughout the Philippines. Many people understood that the implications of such a serious mandate.

In time, my professor saw both the good and the bad side of the Philippines. She remembers fondly though on the good; and reminisces on how the people in her family’s home village were always working hard, always finding meaning in their familial lives, and always willing to help a stranger out in need of aid. She remembers how connected she felt with these people, and how she even enjoyed having to go to the local village’s “water pump” to gather buckets of water for her family and neighbors. She felt as though she had a deeper connection with not only her family, but her community as well. To be looked up and praised by the elders and the children was something she remembers with a kindred heart.

Perhaps the lesson in her time living in the Philippines, is that she finally understood what it meant to live a life full of purpose. You see, even though we are certainly blessed in the states with the possible opportunities we may achieve; we are severely lacking any concrete community throughout our towns, our cities, and even our homes. There is a lack of deeper purpose, even though we may hate to admit it. Though America may have more security in terms of job prospects (even though it is quite low in security if you think about it), it doesn’t necessarily equate to happier lives. Of course, no country is perfect, and in these times of darkness, we must choose what we desire more.

That’s why there’s that old saying: “Would you rather be dirt poor and have all the unconditional love in the world? Or, would you rather be filthy rich and miserably lonely?” It’s a question we must all ask ourselves at different stages of our lives. I believe people, for a time, choose to be filthy rich; and then when they have invested some of their hard-earned money into long-term assets (for their personal income, that is), then they choose to work lower-demand jobs so that they can focus on what really matters in their lives: their family.

You see, life in the Philippines may not be anywhere near as “economically productive” as America, but let’s face it: America and the other 1st world countries are losing their “well-paid” workforce at a faster rate than ever imagined. We are, in some regards and respect, seeing a workforce which is paid lesser and lesser with every passing year. The quality of living is certainly still high in comparison to a lot of economically impoverished countries such as South Sudan, Venezuela, and countless others; but we cannot be so foolish enough to think we are “above” the competition. We are certainly like any other country, susceptible to loss and growth. No matter what happens though, we must remember that we are all a part of a community.

Of course, I also understand the other side of the argument. Many people may not feel aligned with this kind of thinking – and for good reason on their behalf. Competition in the job market is fierce; beyond any reasonable or rational demand. It’s quite disheartening to know that we are forever-competing against our fellow men and women. It leaves little-to-no-room for sympathy or compassion. In fact, it creates an environment of blood-thirsty psychopaths who understand all-too-well the alternative fate. Life is not all peachy after all; and some truths are better left unspoken.

So with that stated, I will end this post on a happier note. Remember, no matter your current situation or plight; you and I understand that what truly matters in the end are the memories we create in this lifetime. It is about the hard work we put into creating a life worth living; not about the hard work alone. Life is about making the best of the cards you were dealt from the beginning. No matter what you go through, remember that at the end of the day – you must sleep with the knowledge of your actions. Because in truth, nobody in the world is a winner. The only “winners” in life, are those who understand the importance of love and growth; who understand that pettiness are just a past-time of wasted energy and wasted potential.

Whether you choose to be economically strong or to be surrounded by people who truly love you; life is but a stage upon which we all play a part in. Don’t lose sight of what you truly desire in life, and remember that you must make necessary sacrifices in order to attain any semblance of economic riches and glory. But in the end; was it worth it all? Was that success worth the otherwise love and compassion you would have otherwise felt if you worked hard and led a life full of humbleness? The answer is different for every human being, and thus, only you and God alone must make that decision. Whatever you do, know that none of us leave this world without a few scars here-and-there. May your day be one of good intentions, for the light of night is upon us once more…

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

 

Source of picture: (click me to view photo credits!)

Update on Life Thus Far!

On By rsnoelIn Blog Posts, Online Journal Entries, Realism Posts, Uncategorized9 Comments

Hey everyone, it’s R.S. Noel, here with a brief update! I hope you’re having a good day so far! It’s nice to finally get some time to catch up on what some of you guys have been up to lately; especially since I don’t have much of a social life anymore (thanks to school and work and YouTube and my dog and this and that…lol). At any rate, life after the holiday seasons seems to be the time of the year where we all transition back into our normal, daily habits (for better or for worse). It’s the time when we begin to fall back into our habits and also when we begin to break our “New Year’s resolutions”. Because let’s face it, only a small portion of people actually believe in New Year’s resolutions. If you really want to accomplish a goal, you’ll do it whenever the time arrives for you to make a decision.

With that stated; I’m sorry for being away for such a long time. College is kicking into high(er) gear and I’ve found myself swamped with my projects and assignments. I just took my Econ 102 Exam #1, and believe I got somewhere between a 96%-99% on it (UPDATE: I got an 86% lol, so much for the overconfidence xD). Of course, we’ll just have to wait and find out what I really got on it. Perhaps my professor will have it ready for us by tomorrow, but I doubt it since we just took it on Thursday. I already checked online and she hasn’t been able to update the grades yet; so my best bet is that she’ll have it up by tomorrow or Wednesday (U.S./Pacific Time).

(Also; side note! I’ve seen some success on YouTube lately, and thought of sharing it with you. So you can click anywhere on this sentence and it’ll take you to one of my more “popular” videos on my channel!)

Aside from Economics 102, I had two quizzes in my Accounting 120 class (computerized accounting), and got a 12/13 on the first one, and a 13/14 on the second one. There’s always a trick question on each quiz, so it really does add a layer of attention-to-detail to it. Not my favorite aspect to the quizzes, but nevertheless, I haven’t let that annoy me too much. In fact, I find that it helps me to realize what I’m missing whenever I’m looking at data sets or just questions in general when regarding QuickBooks or any other “basic” type of accounting system.

At any rate; when I’m not at school I’m most likely at work. I work only Fridays, Saturdays, and some Sundays at my place-of-employment (a boutique-like coffee shop). That definitely works with my schedule (It helps, because next semester I’ll be taking my last Economics class: Economics 101: Microeconomics, and I’ll also be taking my last novice Accounting class: Accounting 102: Managerial Accounting.) Not to mention, I’ll also be taking Business Law I (which is BUSAD 120) and and Written Business Communication (which is BUSAD 106). Both of those classes are “Business and Administration” classes (or as most college students abbreviate it to be: BUSAD). Luckily, I’ll be focusing almost entirely on Accounting/Financing/Computer Science once I transfer out of my community college to my CalState for my “Upper Division” requirements).

I suppose that leads me to what my major and minors will be. I’m majoring in Accounting; and double-minoring in Finance and Computer Science. In this day and age, you can never be “too-educated” or skilled. It seems like the job market is ever-the-competitive.

Now that all of that nonsense is out of the way; I did want to let you know that I have about 12 articles in reserve. They need a lot (and a mean A LOT) of reviewing and editing though before I even think of letting them lose into the wild known as the Internet. Again, sorry for the lack of content on the blog/website. I haven’t had any time at all to really just sit down and relax. However, I will try and find the time in the near-future (realistically, I should have some more time perhaps this weekend; and also some free time in about 2-weeks from next week). With that stated, if my schedule is freed up for this weekend, I’ll be dedicating it to primarily just editing my content here on the blog;  and also uploading another video to my YouTube channel.

Thank you to those who have decided to stick it out here on my blog/website; I can only promise you that I’ll have the next couple of articles (about 4-6) up within the next 3 weeks. After that, I have a week off (so I should be able to upload 4 in one week; and also write some more posts/articles in reserve). I can tell you right now that one of my articles in the editing process is about the Philippines and the social environment that’s currently been changed thanks to the President of the Philippines. Some of you may already know what I’m talking about, but I thought I’d just give you all a little hint.

Well, that’s all that’s really going on in my life at the moment. I’ll keep you guys posted periodically; but for now, I’ll be going back to studying and doing some more small projects here-and-there. You can expect the next post/article to be up by this weekend. Again, I appreciate all of the patience and support you’ve given me over the last couple of weeks. College is really crazy and hectic, but in the end- I’ll be better at networking and finding opportunities wherever they exist. No matter how hard it is for me to get through any obstacles, I know I can let my work ethic speak for itself. With that said, I will speak with you guys again in the future, till then ~

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

Source of picture: (click me to view photo credits!)

A Truth Unspoken

On By rsnoelIn Blog Posts, Online Journal Entries, Realism Posts, Uncategorized5 Comments

Hey everyone, it’s R.S. Noel here hoping you had a fantastic New Year’s Day! Just a couple of small updates before today’s post (or re-post as it were). I’ll be in school throughout January and the first week of February taking my Economics 102 class and my Accounting 120 course as well. The winter semester begins on January 8th and ends on February 8th. It’ll be an intensive 1-month long semester (but I’ve done it 3 times before, twice during the winter semester, and once in the summer semester). Moreover, I’ll be working only weekends at my job – so that time will likely be when I get to upload some of my newer posts. For now, however, I should still be able to upload at least 2-4 posts a week (depending on the severity of the projects in college and what not).

And if you haven’t already checked out my revamped YouTube channel, here’s a link to view some of my recent uploads (I mainly upload compilations of funny videos on the internet, so if you’re in need of a good ol’ laugh, come check it out :).

With that stated, I wanted to share this post I had uploaded a while back. I decided to repost it because I felt like it was relevant to the times we live in. I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it!:

 

I feel myself steadily slipping into the abyss of life. It’s a great feeling really, I feel as though I’ve finally begun to see people for who they really are; for both the positives and negatives. It’s as though there’s a whole other world out there with endless possibilities, yet it’s a hidden realm. For the reality of our lives, are that we’re faced with adversity and obstacles at every turn. It’s a world riddled with riddles and marred with the inevitability of the world’s reality.

You see, there are numerous ways a person’s day could go. The probability that it could all end today is a very real reality. Yet that’s what makes life so enticing and enthralling, the rush and thrill of the chase, of the unknown variables lurking and hiding just beyond the bend. It’s one of the greatest things about life. There’s a sort of maddening sense of things to come, yet nothing ever does come. It’s a feeling of a new day arriving, and it fact, that new day does finally arrive – but not the way you would have expected it to.

There are times in which I wonder if life really is all about the small details. Perhaps it is, perhaps I’ve been living life all-wrong. I’ve always looked for the bigger picture, the grand opportunity to grasp a hold of something in which I know very well could be out of my humanly grasp. Yet I reach out to it nevertheless; knowing full well the risks and possibilities of it all coming down. 

Should we pick the pieces up? The pieces of our silently broken lives? Or, should we recreate a new self, in which we can try and attempt to fill the void of nothingness with senseless materialistic items which will never satisfy our true wants and needs in life. Of course I can go on and on, but I think it’s better to just assume that there are worse fates out there. Fates in which people must face their lives with humiliation and defeat, fates in which there are no possibilities for hope to grow again. It’s both a beautiful and cruel world. When one looks closer upon a second glance, they see the world for the first time ever.

So I’ll end with this: whatever you decide to do with your life, do it with full knowledge that you’re taking a leap of faith in risking it all. Do it wholeheartedly, and know that you won’t come out of this unscathed. Life has too many variables to consider after all, but if you consider them for too long, you’ll never get to living life.

 

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

An Open Letter to the Universe

On By rsnoelIn Blog Posts, Online Journal Entries, Realism Posts, Uncategorized2 Comments

Hello world, it’s R.S. Noel just checking-in to see how things are going in the world currently.

I wonder…why are there so many possibilities? Why is there ab endless array of choices to choose from? There’s a bottomless list of items, destinations, and places I’ve yet to venture to – because, I’ve been so enraptured by the things I still feel are necessary to do before I ever get to that point in life. I’ve started so many things recently in my life, and oddly enough; I don’t feel overwhelmed this time around. I actually feel productive and ready to take on the world with all of its painful and glorious moments.

Feeling productive is certainly not the same as being enslaved by our limitless efforts to  find some semblance of peace in our lives; or is it? There are people who are less fortunate then me, and then, there are many other people who are more fortunate then us. I wonder, what is our lot in this life? To toil away for the rest of our days, to break our bodies down over time due to the natural progression of life? Certainly there is something more out there, or is there…?

Maybe it really is all about perspective. Maybe it truly does come down to “in the eye of the beholder.” Whatever each of us, on an individual level, seeks out in life will depend greatly on our secret wishes, dreams, and desires.

But then, there are those moments. Ah yes, those moments of complete and utter bewilderment, confusion, and delusion. I begin to feel myself slowly drifting off into nothingness, barely holding onto the single metaphorical piece of wood which accompanies me down this stream which leads to the vast unknown.

Oddly enough; in this moment of immense uncertainty, I feel more connected with the world and the universe then I have ever felt before. In this moment of absolute distortion and chaos, I see the world. I see what is and what was. I see the beauty of friendship and camaraderie grow like a wild rose in the plains of heaven. I see the injustice and cruelty of cold, callous hearts, and all of the injustices thrown onto the people of this physical world. I see the lines of society blur between the lines of humanity, for better and for worse. I see marriage between two souls forever intertwined in a moment of inescapable blessings and curses. I see the mingling of darkness veiled within the expanse of light. I see the truth, no matter the mood.

So I say on this finite note, the many esoteric words no other human dares speak.

Why are you willingly allowing the world to change who you are? Who are you even? You should be changing the world, not the other way around. There are no excuses, there are no good reasons. You must steady your hand and stand tall for what you believe in. Take your convictions and grow a garden of life, not of evil. Don’t be afraid of the darkness either, for both light and dark create the equilibrium of life. Always remember however, to tread carefully.

Lest you get lost in the void of no-return. Then, and only then, will you forever lose yourself within the abysmal and unfamiliar darkness of surreal realities…

 

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

 

Source of Photo (Click Me for Photo Credits)

Gaining New Perspectives in Life

On By rsnoelIn Blog Posts, Realism Posts, Uncategorized7 Comments

When you write, a lot of the times there are many different angles to look at any given situation you’re focused on. Whether you’re writing a non-fiction or fiction book, you’ll usually find yourself wondering which way is the best manner in which to start or view your topic of choice. It’s always important to see something from multiple viewpoints, you never want to look at a piece of writing and wonder what the purpose behind it is.

Yet this post isn’t about writing. No, it’s about the new perspectives gained through being more aware of your environment (both imagined and real).

Some of the best methods of gaining a new perspective in your life is to imagine what your own experience would be like in a different person’s position. Better yet, you can also imagine what the world must feel like on a daily basis. Just imagine what the life of a mouse must be like. Or even how the sound of a clock ticks while an empty house remains silent amidst a time of vast uncertainty. The possibilities are endless with this type of thinking.

There’s no end to creativity, the only limit is yourself. Never be too afraid, always question the validity of a person, a situation, or even the state of our world. The more you start to question, the more you begin to realize that everything in life is permitted. With this viewpoint, you can better understand a lot of the current world affairs in today’s globalized society.

A defining moment in any person’s life, is characterized by a sense of awakening, or even a sense of understanding herself/himself in the world and where they stand in it. It can be a truly humbling, and sometimes even terrifying, realization when you begin to understand and come to terms with a lot of the realities of our existence and what it even means to be human in this ever-changing environment. To grasp your own identity is the single best thing you can ever do, not only for yourself, but for those around you who truly love you and cherish you for who you are as a human being in the world.

On a more transparent note, I want to let you know, that perspective also helps you to heighten your sense of awareness of the crueler fates amidst our globalized world. Because in some manner, you will realize that even if you’re just one person in a sea of others, you can change the world (even if it is at a micro-level, it’s still very significant in the grander scheme of life). Your actions, especially during times of hardship and uncertainty in your society, can help to further strengthen the bonds and connections you have with those around you.

Perspective of different people, different life-forms, and different ideologies, is probably the best tool to have if you are a writer. You’re able to understand so many otherwise mysterious concepts in mainstream society. You’re able to better analyze why something happened, and the many different things that caused it.

It’s kind of like being a detective, but the only thing is, no one in the entire world knows you’re paying attention.

If you choose to be naïve or willingly ignorant, I cannot judge you. I used to judge people on being ignorant, back when I was a teenager. But now that I’m an adult, I’ve come to understand that everything (and I mean everything) has a reason for being the way it is; and those things don’t necessarily change as quickly as they should. Some things can stay the “same” for a very, very long time. Inevitably, however, things do change. Whether it be in minutes, hours, days, months, years, centuries, or a millennia – everything eventually succumbs to change.

I could go on, but my time is limited today. I have a lot of work to do, and so little time to finish it. If anything, I’ll leave you with one simple thought: hold the deepest parts of yourself close to your soul, but also let the world see a part of who you truly are. In this way, you can better build your own personality through the different tribulations and trials out there in our shared environment.

After all, we show only the parts of ourselves which we want the world to see. Ultimately, this is what makes perspective so fascinating and intriguing. Different perspectives are the only hidden truth worth discovering in this estranged and chaotic world.

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

In Times of Darkness

On By rsnoelIn Blog Posts, Online Journal Entries, Realism Posts, Uncategorized3 Comments

Some days are more difficult than others; but I’ve recently discovered that no matter where you are in your life, you can always make the best of any situation no matter the adversity. After all, there’s no true end-goal in our lives; there are only opportunities to succeed or fail.

Hi everyone, it’s me R.S. Noel coming to you with another post, and today I’ll be discussing the amazing power within you and me.

In times of darkness, we can become more than just ordinary people. We are all incredibly talented in one way or another; and as human beings, we have the chance and opportunity to truly take what is ours. In this society driven by pure competition and favoritism; we as people can still find ways to make a difference in the world. We need 3 things: hard-work, opportunity, and luck. Even if people try to sabotage you in some way, or even if you feel under-appreciated in your work, or even if you think you’ll never succeed; the truth of the matter is that you have to try first in order to know what you can do to better your chances of success at whatever it is you’re actively working at.

I’ve realized at 24 years of age, that nothing is impossible. Truly nothing. You can quite literally materialize whatever you so desire into the real world without any opposition. One way or another, you will succeed – even if it’s not the way you had once originally envisioned it to be like.

I think the beautiful thing about life right now is that we’re living in a very unique period of vast-knowledge and also a time of grave uncertainty. It is a clash of both something good and something incredibly bad. Of course, that’s how life usually works. There must always be a Yang to every Yin. No matter how bad we want life to be this easy road to success, we have to remember that reality is much harsher than that. We must make sacrifices in order to achieve whatever it is that we want. We must also remember that we must put in the necessary time in order to make things work.

For example, my older brother who is just about to turn 31 years old, has had a plan set in motion since he was 20. He has already completed college with a degree in graphic designing. But he’s content with his job, which is working at the local supermarket. He has gained about 12 years already with his store, and he plans to retire from there and eventually find another job to coincide with his retirement checks from the supermarket. This is something that he has actively worked at and I am really proud of him. Of course, other people may see this as a failure, but I see it as an achievement. He’s part of a union, and he’ll likely never get fired or laid-off, so he has more security in his job than many other people his age. That is certainly something to be proud of, especially since we live in an age of massive instability.

I digress though, back to the main topic at hand.

In times of darkness, we are faced with a multitude of personal questions which we must answer in order to move ahead in our own lives.

Like; where do I want to be in 5 years? In 10 years?

What kind of lifestyle do I want to live by?

Do I want to be married and have kids one day soon? Or am I a free spirit who would rather travel around America or the world?

These are the kinds of questions we must all ask ourselves as we grow older and more aware of our own surroundings. Life has never been easy or simple; that’s the truth of it. That’s why every time I hear “why do humans have to make life so difficult” I merely laugh to myself in silence. Humans were meant to make life difficult. We aren’t a docile or even quiet breed of creatures. We are intelligent, proud, and even opinionated (some more than others). EVERYONE’s lives are difficult, no matter what kind of government system we have. no matter what societal rules we construct, and no matter what expectations we place on our people.

Life for humans was never designed to be “simple” or “easy”. It was created to be challenging. It was meant to be a life-or-death experience. It was meant to be cherished and scorned. Life for humans was meant to be a life-long journey wrought with happiness and pain all mixed together. To push ourselves further than we could ever imagine. Life is a roller-coaster with only one end, that being death. So you might as well get out there and take life by the horns.

Nobody will make that choice for you; only you can make those hard decisions in life yourself.

That’s what I think is a potential problem with our modern day society. Our parents, grandparents, etc., etc., have really coddled us into being “too soft”. Four years ago, I was a completely different man than I am today. Sometimes I can’t even begin to fathom how I used to be. I would have never survived in the world by myself if I never evolved and matured. And even still, I have much left to learn and grow from. That’s a natural process to life after all. If you try and stop the inevitable change from happening, than you’ll never be fully prepared for what life has to offer us.

In times of darkness, there are moments which escape us that can never be recalled again. If we let slip those opportunities of hardship, we may never grow if we don’t accept the challenges that await us on the other side.

I once dated a girl for 3 years who was older than me and was afraid to live life. She was shy, a bit on the quiet side, and wasn’t completely sure of herself. Rest assured, after the 3 years we were together, she had blossomed into a woman who was sure of herself and of her goals in life. She wanted to go to New York City and live there; she wanted to experience and learn new things in life beyond college since she finished. She wanted to become an active participant in her own life story. That’s what I love to see; growth. Even though it didn’t work out for us, and we had our differences, I’m still glad that I was able to get her out of her shell. Whoever ends up with her as a partner will be very lucky to have her. She was an incredible young woman, and had become very communicative and open.

Things happen in life; and as you go through changes in your own life, you’ll begin to see the differences around you. You’ll begin to see the many different possibilities out there for you to grab. You’ll begin to understand that you’re bound to make mistakes. More importantly, you’ll begin to appreciate living your life a little more than you might take for granted now.

Conclusively, I think it’s safe to say that you owe it to yourself to go do that thing you’ve always wanted to do. Start that project you’ve always wanted to finish; see where it leads you. Perhaps you’ve always wanted to travel yourself; starting making a financial goal for your traveling needs. It’s never too late to start something new; we as human beings are never done learning. We are ever-evolving and always learning new concepts, ideas, and truths. Don’t let the fear of failure overrule your desire to try something new. That’s the biggest issue in the world, and especially at a time of vast uncertainty as we’re currently facing in our world, there really is no better time to get started on your life then right now.

So go out there and make a difference, even if it’s a small one. After all, all great things in the world have relatively small and insignificant beginnings.

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

Arkanim: Tales of the Enlightened Ones

On By rsnoelIn Blog Posts, Online Journal Entries, Realism Posts, Uncategorized3 Comments

Hello everyone! It’s me R.S. Noel coming to you with another post. For today, I’m going to make it short and also provide another excerpt from Arkanim: Tales of the Enlightened Ones. This is another work-in-progress book that I’ve been writing for a while now. To be honest, this is the very first work-in-progress book I had originally started on when I was 10 years old. But through the years, growing-up got the better of me, and I regrettably put this story aside.

Now, however, life has granted me a wake-up call that I cannot ignore. The story has come full force into my life once again…

The following is a work-in-progress by me, R.S. Noel. I hold and maintain all the rights for the work presented below. Thank you for your interest and understanding. Enjoy!:

It was growing. All around her, she could hear the sounds of light footsteps, of silent windy whispers gliding through the jungle’s vines, of the many different sounds of nature that were now engulfing the foreigners. Rhea couldn’t distinguish between what noise belonged to a human and what noise belonged to the wild life of these unruly jungles.

There was no doubt in her mind that they were being watched closely, it was only a matter of time before something immensely uncertain happened.

Rhea could hear Merthus beginning to breath slightly faster now as the boy had undoubtedly noticed the subtle changes in the Flurrus Jungle as well. Rhea wished at this very moment that she could just comfort the small child, but she knew that it was hopeless to even pretend that everything was all right. She knew that they just needed to survive through this experience. Their lives had become nothing more than the basic instinct of survival. Nothing else mattered; just their willpower to make it out of this mess alive.

Moving a bit quicker through the narrow path they were walking upon, Rhea could tell that Zante was increasingly growing worried as he appeared to turn his head slightly left and right from time to time. Rhea knew that the man was surely trying to figure out if the hidden Urksinians were going to show themselves right now or not.

She knew now at this very moment that Zante Qit’zo truly did care for their wellbeing. If Rhea had any doubts before, they were put to rest as her eyes maintained a steady gaze on the back of Zante’s head. This was the only thing that Rhea could manage to look at, as she feared trying to avert her gaze even slightly away towards the noises that were only continuing to grow around her. It would only serve to bring more trouble to them.

In the distance from this curving road riddled with dark soil, Rhea could see two large arching gates that were closed shut. She could not see beyond that point, as there appeared to be plenty of large vines and roots covering the otherwise visible sight of the village certainly behind the gates.

Some of Rhea’s hair covered her face lightly now, as a tailwind swept to the left side of her. She knew that this was no natural occurrence. Her eyes grew wide with fascination. Someone was running unimaginably fast now behind the veil of the thick jungle life to her left. Rhea did not dare to remove her hair from her face, as she now looked dead straight ahead without even entertaining the thought that she could look elsewhere. Her eyes were wide with paralyzed fear. She knew her inner fear was showing, and she cursed very silently underneath her breath as she wished for nothing else but to hide such vulnerable emotions.

It was without question that Rhea, Merthus, and Dasca were simply not welcomed here. Even before she had seen any of the Urksinians within the village of Kin’uly itself, Rhea was now starting to understand the workings of different people from different parts of the world.

As the group neared closer to the heavily vegetated gates that surely led into the village of Kinkuly, Rhea could see four guardsmen standing ever so silently amongst the vines. Rhea had not seen them before, and likely because they were wearing armor that was the same shade of green as the verdant gates. She was in awe at how unmoving they were, better than statues. Certainly the messenger that Zante had sent ahead of them had let these guardsmen know that they were nearing the village. And by they, Rhea knew she was thinking more along the lines of Dasca, Merthus, and herself.

Gorgirians were not exactly on friendly terms with Urksinians.

Rhea could feel the intensity of those behind her, as she momentarily shut her eyes to allow her fears to subside just a little more.

Then, that’s when it happened.

Jumping from the many trees that were grouped tightly together on both sides of the narrow path – came down about nine native Urksinians. They all appeared intimidating and full of untapped energy. Most of them were men, broad shouldered and towering in size. About two of them were Urksinian women, still equally intimidating with their bulging muscles and unfamiliar physiques.

Yet it was one of the Urksinian men that started to walk straight up to Zante that really caught Rhea’s fearful attention. This man had the broadest of shoulders amongst the newfound Urksinians, thick arms the size of tree trunks, and powerful legs that could likely crush even a newborn gorgus.

He landed squarely in front of Zante as he stared at the man with an unflinching gaze that appeared to bulge out with deep hatred. “Zante Qit’zo…vena’lu hega nemno qora-dod belsion!” [Zante Qitzo…you’ve come back home with slaves in tow!].

Though Rhea had no idea what this unknown new man had just said, she could tell Zante was guarding any sign of emotions as he responded back clearly and with a deepened voice. “Jersde leme’neleno, cirlee – nem belsion.” [They are foreigners – guests; not slaves].

Forever in Your Debt,

R.S. Noel

Source of Photo: (Click Me to View Photo Credits)